You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
