Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
