Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
