So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
