Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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