i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I seem to have left my pride at pride
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Randomize
