So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
we're making bets on your personal life
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
