But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Randomize