Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
