she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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