dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
