I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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