I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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