I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
