Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize