my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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