After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
