She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
