i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
