yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
