i jhust puked up my retainher.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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