I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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