So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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