he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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