I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Randomize
