Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I just had sex on a roof
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