census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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