Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
third nipple confirmed
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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