O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
