you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize