We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
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