Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
