The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
