i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
the day after is always just damage control
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
