Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize