just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
