You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
should my penis look like a turkey
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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