I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize