big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
sex in a hospital.. check
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
