I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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