Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
