i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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