He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
stop calling my apartment porn island.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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