My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
