So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Randomize
