The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
