I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
