omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize