What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
