Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
