puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize