THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
